January 11, 2012

The extension to my left hand broke yesterday – yes, my little white cell phone decided to call it quits. I have often noticed how much I use this little device, how often I text, check Facebook or emails or just plain out Google something. But never have I noticed how much time I spend on the internet until it broke. I found myself wondering, what on earth will I do?

The issue is, much like any unhealthy relationship, there was a ME before there was a WE. Before I had a Smartphone, I did things. I waited till I had a moment to search for things. I wondered about questions and trivia before I could Wikipedia. And I definitely did not have to know who did what when on Facebook at every hour of the day. Since having constant access to the internet I have found myself to be more opinionated, more determined to let every person know my opinion on everything, and having to comment on everything. 

I do not like this about myself. I do not like having my son see me constantly attached to this ridiculous device, constantly having to catch my attention away from it to play or run or chase. I do not like the opinionatedness, the pettiness, the silliness of it all. I especially do not like the fact that I use more time to check my phone than doing what I love: crafting and cooking and being aware.

Tomorrow my new phone arrives. I hope that I can learn something from this experience and take the time to put the phone down. To not check my email a hundred times a day, to hold my tongue and reserve judgement to special occasions. I hope that I can learn enough from this moment of unplugged time to really remember what is most important in my world.


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